Let me be clear: I do not like spiders. At all. I think they’re gross and annoying. This summer the heat brought them indoors and M and I had to grapple with what seemed like an infestation of GIANT eight-legged monstrosities.

Well, I guess I'm NEVER WATCHING TV AGAIN.

Well, I guess I’m NEVER WATCHING TV AGAIN.

You see, they had broken my (very generous) rule: spiders can live in my house as long as I never see them. If I do, they are subject to any number of deaths, usually being squished in a tissue and  flushed down the toilet (and flushed again, just in case they are super-spiders and crawl back up the pipes. It happened once, I swear.). So I killed a bunch of spiders this summer and into the fall.

Soon, spider. Soon.

Soon, spider. Soon.

I became their queen. Their evil, evil queen.

With that in mind, and with Halloween coming up, my lust object this month is the spider! Whee!

Spiders

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