I’ve been a really rubbish blogger again this month. I don’t even have a bunch of good excuses for you – just one: I GOT INTO THE UNIVERSITY OF WASHINGTON!!!! I start in January and am very, very excited. It doesn’t quite feel yet, but I imagine it will as soon as the first tuition check is sent.
Aside from celebrating the good news, holidays and family obligations have also been distracting me, but that’s never not the case. So really, I just blew it this month. My apologies.
In any case, I am really into the black cherry trend right now. You might call the color oxblood, burgundy, maroon, whatever. I prefer black cherry, though, because it reminds me of food and not the blood of a beast of burden. But that’s just me.
I have long loved this shade of red. I really like the look of it on short nails and as a lipstick, the latter of which I think I’m too pale to pull off (actually, I’m just too lazy for lipstick. Plus I tend to eat it off. Yum!). It looks good on everyone and goes with everything. One of my favorite sweaters is a black cherry off-the-shoulder open-knit sweater. I like to wear it with skinny jeans and booties. I look awesome in it, in large part due to the color.
We’re experiencing a pretty long summer here in Seattle – it has been hot. But that hasn’t stopped fall fashion from creeping its way into my mind. One trend I really like right now is pastels for autumn. Normally I’m more of a jewel-toned kind of gal (those jewels being onyx, tourmaline, and obsidian), but I like the juxtaposition of bright, cheery colors against fall’s grey skies and stormy weather. The soft, subtle colors also make for an easy transition from the hot summer we’ve been having to the cool, crisp fall that I hope we’ll be getting soon.
Plus, pastels match rose gold jewelry perfectly, another thing I’m loving right now.
We’ve all made mistakes we aren’t proud of, least of which involve our appearance. While at the time I thought each of the items on this list were the height of beauty/fashion/coolness/whatever, I was very, very wrong. At least my peers were doing equally idiotic things so we all looked like morons together.
- Blue glitter. My mom wasn’t really on board with me wearing makeup when I was in the 4th and 5th grade (who can blame her?), but I was raring to go. While on a trip to Claire’s with some friends, we all bought tiny vials of sticky blue glitter and proceeded to use it almost everyday for the next 6 months. I smeared it on my eyes, lips, cheeks, and hair. It held a special place on my dresser and I felt very, very grown up whenever I wore it. Because grown-ups often slather themselves with sticky, navy blue flecks of shiny plastic.
- Scrunchies were for my hair, obviously – I loved the way they made ponytails stick crazily far out the side of my head. Scrunchies also served as a fashion accessory, too: I used them as bracelets, anklets, and to tie up the sided of my oversized tee shirts.
- Bonne Bell Emotions perfume. Remember these guys? They came in little glass bottles with a silver top. My friends and I went absolutely nuts over them – almost as nuts as we went over gel pens. My favorite was the “Flirty” scent, despite being hideously shy around boys. I thought that if I wore the perfume, boys would flock to me because they would smell my alluring coquettishness like bloodhounds. They did not.
- I loved my overalls and was furious that my mom wouldn’t let me do as the cool girls did and let one of the straps remain unbuckled. Perhaps she thought it was sloppy or stupid looking. Either way, she was correct. For some reason overalls are making a bit of a comeback and all I can say is, unless you’re a farmer or a toddler, WHY.
- Exclamation perfume. This eau de barf by Coty is apparently still being sold at drugstores and online. After I deemed myself too grown up for Bonne Bell, I moved onto this perfume. It claims to be a blend of peach, apricot, amber, and sandalwood, and my friends and I all thought we smelled great, but in actual fact I think we probably smelled more like musky farts.
- Brown lipstick. Because who doesn’t want to look like they just snacked on a turd?
- Puka shell necklaces. These things were ridiculously popular in junior high and made every single wearer – male and female alike – look like a giant douche.
- Over-plucked eyebrows. Right before my freshman year of high school I decided that my eyebrows (which are dark blonde and naturally somewhat sparse already) needed to be taken care of. This meant plucking them within an inch of their life and then drawing them back in a single, thin line. It was certainly a look, but I’m not entirely sure what I was going for. I maimed my eyebrows for years until finally, the summer before junior year, I decided to grow them back. That summer was not pretty, but it was still prettier than my anorexic eyebrows.
- Noxzema and Sea Breeze toner. I thought the tingling, cooling, almost-burning sensation on my skin meant the products were working to eliminate clogged pores and pimples. I was wrong. I now know that ingredients like menthol, alcohol, camphor, and eucalyptus oil are all extremely bad for the skin and strip it of moisture. But those kids in the Noxzema and Sea Breeze commercials looked so good!
- Jelly shoes. I loved my jelly shoes and wore them all summer. Nevermind the fact that spending more than 20 minutes in them would result in icky foot sweat and brown muck on your feet. I desperately wanted the high-heeled ones, but Mom said no. It’s just as well – all the sweat would have made me slip anyway.
- Butterfly clips. Sparkly butterfly clips were all over my head for a few years. Teeny tiny clips that really could only hold a few hairs at a time seemed glamorous and trendy. And who doesn’t want to look like a bunch of bugs have landed in your hair?
- Frosted pink lipstick. While this is slightly better than the poop lipstick, it still makes anyone who wears it looks like a glittery corpse.
- Peel-off nail polish. Nothing says glamour like bits of plastic-y crap stuck to your nails. For some reason they made a comeback a few years ago and a grown-up version of peel-off nail polish was being sold at Anthropologie. I was tempted to buy it, but somehow restrained myself.
- Crimped hair. I loved crimped hair. There are still unfortunate pictures of me at a roller rink with huge, crimped hair. I would spend the night before painstakingly braiding my wet hair and the next morning woke to a big, delightfully poufy coif. When I see crimping irons being sold in stores nowadays, I shake my head. This style looks good on no one.
- Bucket hats. No summer outfit during the 6th grade was complete without my bucket hat. For some reason I thought it made me look trendy and outdoorsy. I’ve since learned that I’m really not a hat person, especially if the hat looks like a bucket.
As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I enjoy exercising quite a bit. This includes weight lifting, which includes squats, deadlifts, power cleans, and generally having to bend over quite a bit. This wouldn’t normally be a problem for me, if it weren’t for two things:
- Lots of women’s workout pants become extremely sheer when you bend over. (I’m looking at you, Lululemon).
- The way my gym’s weight room is situated, there are glass walls facing a hallway that nearly everyone in the gym passed through. The squat rack and hyperextension bench are right in front of the glass walls, so passersby get a direct view of the users’ ass.
These two things alone are irritating, but together, it’s a recipe for embarrassment. So what’s a girl to do? I can’t change the gym’s architectural integrity or move the rack or bench, as the weight room is pretty dinky. It looked like I needed to find some amazing workout pants.
Zella is a brand of women’s activewear available only at Nordstrom. The fabric is incredibly light and breathable while still being opaque through record-breaking squats. Take that, glass wall of oglers!
They are a bit pricier than the pants you’d find at Target or Old Navy, but they won’t degrade in the washing machine or show the world your butt. That’s worth the extra money, if you ask me.
As a bonus, they’re also fantastic for running when it’s a bit colder out. Huzzah!
January really just zoomed by, so I’m only getting to this month’s Lust Object one day shy of February. But I just made it by the skin of my teeth – phew!
This month I’m still feeling cozy and craving the warmth that being indoors with family brings. I just got back from visiting Mom at my childhood home – we watched Downton Abbey and went to see the second Hobbit. We also made turkey soup and just had a lovely time! Anyway, growing up I lived in what is essentially a giant A-frame log cabin. As such, I love natural grain wood and all the character that comes with it. While faux bois isn’t natural (hence the faux), if done correctly, it captures the beauty of real wood in a wide variety of mediums. I’d totally wear a faux bois sheath or carry a faux bois clutch.
Cobalt was a great big trend this spring, and I gotta say: I way prefer it to that season’s usual neons and pastels. Lucky for like-minded cobalt fans, the trend is continuing into the fall. If I’m being really honest, though, what really drew me to cobalt initially was one of M’s figurines of Sonic the Hedgehog. Go figure.
Cobalt is great because it goes with everything. It looks wonderful with neutrals, but is particularly striking with other bold colors such as fuschia and orange.
Let me be clear: I do not like spiders. At all. I think they’re gross and annoying. This summer the heat brought them indoors and M and I had to grapple with what seemed like an infestation of GIANT eight-legged monstrosities.
You see, they had broken my (very generous) rule: spiders can live in my house as long as I never see them. If I do, they are subject to any number of deaths, usually being squished in a tissue and flushed down the toilet (and flushed again, just in case they are super-spiders and crawl back up the pipes. It happened once, I swear.). So I killed a bunch of spiders this summer and into the fall.
I became their queen. Their evil, evil queen.
With that in mind, and with Halloween coming up, my lust object this month is the spider! Whee!